Wrapped in Pleasure: Why Safer Sex Is Sexy Sex

A Masterclass in Keeping Our Encounters Hot and Healthy

I absolutely love my job, but one thing that gets my panties in a twist is constant requests for unprotected services. I don’t judge anyone for their choices. Bodily autonomy is everything, and I am a huge advocate for everyone's right to choose. But what does bother me is when people disregard my clearly stated boundaries. No sexual encounter is completely risk-free (only abstinence can guarantee this, and who wants that!?) So I thought I’d share a few facts about “safer” sex and why my boundaries exist. This isn’t a lecture. It’s just a little insight into how I protect both my health and yours, so every moment we share can be as indulgent as it should be.

Bare-Back Blow Job (BBBJ)

This is a commonly requested service, and many sex workers do offer it. I fully support every providers right to choose, but it's just not for me. While the risk of STI transmission is generally lower than with vaginal or anal sex, it is still substantial, and many of these infections can be passed even without ejaculation. At least nine different STIs can be transmitted via uncovered fellatio (some of these are incurable). It’s just not worth jeopardising my health, or yours, for temporary pleasure. The flip side? Many of my regular clients tell me they keep coming back because our time together is safe, intimate, and worry-free. For every man who is disappointed that I don’t offer BBBJs, there are just as many who deeply appreciate that I don't. And don’t worry… I’ve been told my blow jobs are unforgettable, condom or not! Holding this boundary also allows me to save certain pleasures for my personal relationship at home.

Cum in Mouth/Cum on Face (CIM/COF)

Anytime bodily fluids mix, there’s a risk. Sperm, saliva, mucus; they can all transmit infections. Did you know you can contract syphilis in your eye? It is a potential gateway for infection. I also have sensitive eyes and a very acute sense of taste. These activities are just not enjoyable or comfortable for me.

Health Checks

This is an industry term for a visual inspection of your genital area, to check for any signs or symptoms of STIs. I perform this for every client, at every booking. Some providers conduct a more overt check, asking for consent to inspect areas such as the foreskin, shaft, testicles, and pubic hair. When I first started in the industry, I used to do it this way too. Now I choose a more subtle and discreet approach (you’ll probably barely notice I’m doing it). Condoms protect against most infections, but some can still be transmitted skin-to-skin, or if an accident occurs like slippage or breakage. A health-check is simply a small precaution so we can focus on what truly matters… each other.

Genital-On-Genital Contact

Also called frottage. Rubbing can feel incredible, but it’s still risky. It is fine for us to engage in this kind of foreplay (in fact, I welcome it), however a condom must be used in order to protect us both. Even pre-cum can carry infections, and the last thing we want is a health scare.

Safe Condom Use

There is a little more to safe condom use than just accepting that you have to put one on. In this case, size does matter! Please allow me to use my considerable expertise to select your condom size. This minimises any slipping or strangulation. It may also eliminate that pesky "feels better without it" attitude. A correctly fitting condom can feel almost as natural as bare.

Lube matters! It ensures my comfort, as well as the integrity of the latex. Saliva is not a substitute for lube. Likewise, shower sex is off the table for me as it can compromise the latex, although I encourage touching and kissing in the shower as an excellent form of foreplay.

Once the show is over, there can be no encore. In other words, once you have "finished," please stop immediately and remove the used condom. If you continue having sex with a full condom, or if you lay there inside me, it is likely that you will leak.

If you have the stamina to go another round, a shower in between is mandatory. Wet-wipes do not remove all traces, and therefore do not remove the risk. What's the price of a minute or two in the shower for a little peace of mind? Safety first, pleasure always.

Kissing

Kissing is one of the most sensual and arousing parts of intimacy, and I myself, adore it! However, if you have cold sores, mouth ulcers, a cold or flu, or any other viral or bacterial infections, please let me know before your booking. Illnesses cost me time, money, and suffering. I never come to work unwell, because I care about the health and safety of my wonderful clients. I appreciate the same courtesy shown to me.

Cunnilingus

This is one activity I do offer uncovered, and here’s why… The risk of unprotected oral sex varies depending on who is giving and who is receiving. The direction of genital fluid transfer makes a difference. For example, a BBBJ carries more risk for me than it would for you, since I am ingesting the fluid. Conversely, uncovered dining at the Y (DATY) carries greater risk for you than for me. Everyone has different comfort levels when it comes to risk, and that’s perfectly okay. Personally, I am comfortable with the risk profile of uncovered oral on me. It’s entirely up to you whether you feel the same. For those who prefer extra protection, I always come prepared with dental dams and am more than happy to use them at your request.

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I don’t set these rules to be a buzzkill. I do it because my boundaries around safety and comfort are very important to me. It is a common misconception that sex workers are more prone to STIs than regular civilians. This is untrue. Peer-reviewed research consistently shows that sex workers have higher rates of condom use, regular screening, peer-based sexual health education, and lower rates of STIs than the general public, particularly in jurisdictions where the work is decriminalised (Chow et al., 2014; Seib et al., 2009; Tang et al., 2013). We are very highly educated on safe sex, and we are practiced in setting and maintaining firm boundaries. These boundaries aren’t arbitrary. They ensure every encounter is pleasurable, safe, and worry-free. Respect them, and I promise some of the most unforgettable, uninhibited sex of your life.

Think of it this way... Using protection doesn’t take away the thrill, it amplifies it. You get to relax, focus on sensation, and fully enjoy me without a single nagging worry. No stress, minimal risk, maximal indulgence. Safer sex isn’t just smart, it’s sexy, seductive, and utterly satisfying.

Stay safe, lovers.

Until next time…

Jasmine x

Chow, E. P., Fehler, G., Chen, M. Y., Bradshaw, C. S., Denham, I., Law, M. G., & Fairley, C. K. (2014). Testing commercial sex workers for sexually transmitted infections in Victoria, Australia: An evaluation of the impact of reducing the frequency of testing. PloS one, 9(7), e103081. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0103081

Seib, C., Debattista, J., Fischer, J., Dunne, M., & Najman, J. M. (2009). Sexually transmissible infections among sex workers and their clients: Variation in prevalence between sectors of the industry. Sexual Health, 6(1), 45–50. https://doi.org/10.1071/sh08038

Tang, H., Hocking, J. S., Fehler, G., Williams, H., Chen, M. Y., & Fairley, C. K. (2013). The prevalence of sexually transmissible infections among female sex workers from countries with low and high prevalences in Melbourne. Sexual Health, 10(2), 142–145. https://doi.org/10.1071/SH12114